I processed one of my lomo film again. The results are still.. hmm.. not satisfying enough. yea, it's like gambling to take a picture with lomo as we can't see the result before process it. AHHHHH ! *stress out. Why are you so hard to use ( i named this Diana Mr. Pink lomo as Miki by the way :p)
You know what, this lomo thingy makes me challenged that i will get better results.
I hate being sick. Especially when i'm far away from home. Like now. It was started since saturday, and the worst was on saturday night and sunday. I got runny nose, headache, cough, and fever. Fortunately, it's getting better.
If i'm home, my mom will cook me some hot soup or something to make my body warm
and my dad will give me a medicine.
But now i have to take care of myself, and i feel soo sad because i need to be in a place where i can feel secure. And it's home. Sleep in my own bed, with my own blanket.
Thanks to my friend here, she wants to accompany me to the chemist to buy medicine. She was accompanying me the whole day today. :) At least, i can feel that i'm not totally alone.
This is kinda STUPID. yeah, silly. In other words, retarded. Well, i was going to process my lomo film in some store in the city. Then, here we go the silly conversation :
The girl: " Okay, you can take it on Monday. Is it ok ? What's your family name ?"
Me: " (thinking) mhhh.. just write Angela "
The girl: " And.. your first name ? "
Me: " Stefani "
The girl: " So this is your family name ? "
Me: " yeahh.. kind of "
The girl: " (looks confused) oh okay.. "
Me: " ... "
Suddenly, i just didn't know who my name was. Maybe they thought asian people should have a particular family name, not an english name. What do they expect if my name is just Stefani Angela ? *rolling eyes.
Perhaps, another time i will just make up my family name for this kind of case. It will be funny then :p
Nothing new to post actually. I just get bored and suddenly my hand click the "new post" then.. here i am. Writing unimportant thing. :p. Well, currently i'm sitting on my desk, studying statistics, but my head is looking around. Why ? because there's a shitty lizard in my room since 2 days ago. I'm sooo dead if i have to deal with it. I'm trying to get rid of it, but it still in my room. Even i already open my door, it still doesn't want to come out. Did i make any big sin so i have to "sleep" with it. :(
But anyway, this is the way i kill my boredom.
I got that teddy from my honey as valentine's day present. hehe.
You know what, i really really miss you. All i want to do first in the morning is to hear your voice as i can't see your face directly now. Well, it's a lie if i say that's enough. It will never be enough to be with you. I wish someday when i open my eyes, i can see the real you. Not a picture. Not only a voice. But YOU !
Yes, i went to Byron Bay today with my friends. It's located in New South Wales. Thus, we went there by bus and it took about 2 hours from Brisbane to get there. It was a bit hot and shiny while Brisbane was having a heavy rain. Yeayyy another good weather means another photo-shoot :D
When i saw the lighthouse, suddenly i remembered about shutter island movie. omg.
I was looking at the old pictures. It's funny to see the old you and say this to yourself "omg, did i look like that ?!". Then, suddenly i opened the folder named "Graduation". There are pictures when me and my friends were graduated from high school. It's not so long time ago, but still it brings back a lot of memories- the teachers, the school's building, the rules, and especially friends. :)
June 13th, 2009
I'm so thankful i had a chance to finish my high school in 2 years, yet sometimes i wish i can feel those happy moments a little bit longer :)
Express the feeling sometimes is not like just simply saying how do you feel inside. Yes, for certain situation words can't easily come out from your mouth and bam ! everything has been said and done. I will prefer to keep it in my mind if i really CAN'T say it. Probably some people will think that how hypocrite i am ! Well, i don't need to care about it as long as i know what i'm doing. And it is surely based on some reasons.
Somehow, i feel so happy today. Even me and my friends were just hanging around. :)
Well, lately the weather in here is very random and weird. As it will be autumn soon, it's raining and shining at the same time. And windy too ! But, thanks for sunshine, i still can took some pictures that are better than on rainy days. :p
We were just strangers. We had never talked or even met before. We did not know each other's names. And then, we were friends. We were telling our stories. We were still shy. We were never did any silly things. And then, we were best friends. We started to open our minds. We were smiling. We were telling jokes. We were texting. But we kept be friends for years.
And now, we are one. We are telling everything. We are doing silly things. We are laughing crazily. We are celebrating valentine's day together. We are celebrating our 1st Anniversary too ! :)
When i was walking at the city today, i was realized that i'm too tired of myself. Then i tend to blame someone, instead. I should not be like this. I really have never expected this, though. On the other side, i don't want to be blamed for being this kind of moody person. I'm still an ordinary human that can't be always able to handle everything i'm facing, even i thought i could. I gotta be happier at least on the weekend. Well, in fact that thought is not working today as i just realized. One of my friends here said "Stefani, why you look so sad and tired ? everyday you look the same, on the weekdays at campus or on the weekend. Hope something can make you happier." See, how i'm affected others. I felt so guilty. It seems like i can't control myself for anything. It doesn't mean i never tried to ignore this feelings. Miles away from people i love probably one of the reasons to make me feel so low lately. Losing any excitement and motivation i really feel as the time goes by. The days are becoming more and more hectic, crazy, and it's like i don't have anymore space in my mind to patch these things. My mind will be blown up slowly if so. This is really just not me. Will i lose my-really-self as i lose my motivation ?
Apparently i just keep asking one question to myself "what's the meaning of life ?"